Subj: DG: A Conversation with Space Ghost Date: 98-05-14 19:38:22 EDT From: mib@cyberspace.org (The Man in Black) Sender: owner-deltagreen@nocturne.org Reply-to: deltagreen@nocturne.org (Delta Green List) To: deltagreen@nocturne.org (Delta Green List) CAST OF CHARACTERS (mib) : The Man in Black, nuff said! (SG) : Space Ghost, cosmic super hero (punk): Carl Stanford, sorcerer and master of shameless self-promotion (Zorak): Zorak, a big bug (JT) : John "Puppetboy" Tynes, famous game designer TRANSCRIPT BEGINS (MEMCON) (SG) : "Welcome back citizens! Our guest tonight is The Man in Black. MIB, I have an amazing physique that astounds evildoers and many super powers. Do you have any super powers?" (mib) : "Oh, yeah. That's just my style." (SG) : "What kind of super powers?" (adjusts powerbands) (mib) : "Well, like all gamers, I'm a chick magnet. Yep, have to beat 'em off with a stick. Also, I can talk to protomatter." (SG) : "And what does the protomatter have to say?" (mib) : "Not too much really. Say, could you blast Zorak for me?" (SG) : "Sure!" (blasts Zorak into a charred inverted mass) (Zorak) : "Ow." (mib) : "That was cool. Do it AGAIN!" (SG) : "O. K." (blasts Zorak again) (Zorak) : (somewhat charred and singed) "What was that for?" (SG) : "We have to be polite to our guests, Zorak." (punk) : "HI! I'm Carl Stanford, and I will be appearing in the upcoming Chaosium publication 'Day of the Beast' Watch for me!" (mib) : "Dammit Carl, how many times have I told you to stay the hell off my airtime?! Nobody cares about your stupid reprints!" (grabs Carl's cane and beats him severely with it, then tosses him down a stairway out into a narrow alley. Immediately, a large black Cadillac driven by Jesse 'the Body' Ventura roadkills the unfortunate sorcerer. MIB then snaps the cane in two) (SG) : "My, wasn't that exciting and overly violent." (mib) : "Sorry about that, that guy really gets on my nerves." (SG) : "Oh-Kay! Tell us about Delta Green." (mib) : "Sure, DG is a game about cute and fuzzy bunnies, striving to survive in a world they never made. It's based on a book of french erotica set on the Titanic called 'Watership Down' written by Steffan O' Sullivan. It takes place on the planet Venus and also features lots of really big guns and swashbuckling." (JT) : "That is like, totally incorrect in every way." (mib) : "Quiet YOU! Or I tell everyone about that unmarketable Puppet game!" (JT) : "GASP!" (leaves quietly) (SG) : "So, tell me more about Delta Green." (mib) : "Like I was saying, DG is about women. Macho women. Macho women with the 'top heavy' disadvantage. So it's an equal opportunity, women's lib kinda game. Also..." (punk) : "It's me! Carl Stanford! I'm back! I also Appear in 'The Complete Masks of Stefan Alzis' but not in that pesky australian chapter." (mib) : "Didn't I just kill you?" (punk) : "Yeah, but I got better." (mib) : "I see." (pulls out the *bubble gun* and shoots Carl, who is vaporized across several dozen different dimensions) (the bubble gun fires a sphere of reverse time tachyons which rips many warps in that whole Space/time thing. So it basically shoots YOG-SOTHOTH at you.) (mib) "HAR! HAR!" (SG) : "Is there more about Delta Green that you're not telling us?" (mib) "There's a book and another book and a T-shirt." (SG) : "Neato!" (punk) : "HAH! You can knock me down, but I get back up again! That's because I, Carl Stanford, am the chosen of the Beast! I will rule this basic cable talk show and the WORLD WILL BE MINE! MUAHAHAHAHAH!" (mib) : "Carl, why don't you do me, and everyone else on this mailing list a big favor and go back to the green room and pour yourself a nice warm cup of SHUT THE HELL UP!" (kicks Carl in the nuts and performs the professional wrestling manuever known as the "Stone Cold Stunner" or "Diamond Cutter" on Carl who is doubled over in pain. Calls out to the rear, and the entire nWo runs out and proceed to kick the bejeezus out of Carl while he's down). (punk) : (uses fist of YOG-SOTHOTH to break up the nWo who all cowardly retreat, except for Jesse 'the Body' Ventura who scoops up Carl and gives him the Backbreaker, to which Carl replies: "Roswell! ROSWELL!") (mib) : (kicking Carl's prone body) "That's right, who's the ICON, Who's the man, who's the main event at the pay-per-view?" (punk) : "nWi! nWi 4 Life! GAAACK!" (SG) : "Well that's it for this Space Ghost Coast to Coast! Tune in next week when our guest is Punch the Maker Killer!" TRANSCRIPT ENDS (mercifully)
